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Why Do I Need A Divorce Coach?

When I am asked what it is I do for a living, I often receive mixed reactions. People most of the time feel intrigued, puzzled or uneasy.

This short article is an explanation of what I do and how it can help you overcome the trials of today. Most of the feelings and views expressed also come from my own lived experiences all of which are used to help people going through all kinds of separation and divorce.

Some of the responses I receive are: “I’ve never heard of that before. I didn’t know such a role existed. What does a Divorce Coach actually do?” However…

More frequently I hear… “I wish I’d had known of this service when I went through my divorce. This is not surprising because statistics show that there are over 100,000 divorces every year in the UK alone.” Divorce Coaching is an expanding niche that is drastically underserved. People seek professional support from legal and financial experts, but where do they go to find emotional support? Getting unmarried is emotionally and financially harder than getting married. One is dividing up the marital home, precious time with the children, bank accounts, assets, belongings, family, and friends. How can one handle all of this whilst feeling heartbroken and bereft? The loss feels insurmountable. The future is daunting and the life they have known will never be the same.

Clients need a guide to walk them through the process so they don’t feel so alone and helpless. They want someone to help them to understand the process, develop clarity, confidence, courage, and build resilience as they navigate their way through the twist and turns of divorce. Divorce coaching can fulfill those needs. A Divorce Coach ensures that clients don’t drown in the choppy seas of the entire process. They will listen without judgment, guide, support, and motivate people through a divorce to help them make the best possible decisions for their future and for the future of their children.

why divorce coaching swan

The process is overwhelming and terrifying, therefore, a Divorce Coach will help to lessen these feelings so that the client can put more energy and think into how they and their spouse are going to reduce the negative impact on their family as much as possible. The adjustment to people’s lives can be exceptionally difficult to accept because there is so much change all at once. A Divorce Coach can work with clients to minimize and understand the impact of these changes through each phase; pre-divorce, planning, processing, and post-divorce. A Divorce Coach can hold the client’s hand through the entire process and out the other side. What is important is not what happens to us, but how we respond to what happens to us!

During the pandemic many problems have been exacerbated however, Divorce Coaching can get your life back on track, helping to fulfill your needs. You too hold the power to change your life. You, and only you, can effect these changes by consciously taking control of your life and your future. It’s simple, but it isn’t easy. Change will come, but you must be open to making new and different choices. It will be worth it. You have the rest of your life ahead of you, ready for the taking. You will be able to create a vibrant life that you love.

T he world is a big place. Your heart may have been broken, but you are worthy of finding love again with someone who will reciprocate this unrequited love. In every divorce there is usually at least one broken heart, the one that loved and lost, the one that still secretly hopes for a change of heart or reconnection with an ex spouse. This “love” you think you have for your ex is most likely not going to reignite, so you really need to learn to let this go, in all relationships why would you wish to be with someone, who doesn’t wish you to be with you? You shouldn’t is the answer because out there, are seven billion more people you can meet who want you for you. So let this love go and focus on the new.

Busy as a Bee

The bee is more honored than other animals, not because she labors, but because she labors for others. Labouring for too much for others however can stop you labouring for yourself! Be strong and labour all the same.

– St. John Chrysostom

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